Confused

Ok, so it's been awhile, I know. Not a lot has changed, just working, a lot. Currently, there are times that I go for weeks without a day off. I don't mind, usually. It gives me something to do, makes me a little monies.

I think fear is getting the better of me. Like it always does, and I'm not talking spiders. I think I sell myself short in a lot of areas. I'm currently re-thinking event planning. After talking about it for so long, and being so sure of myself, I don't know what direction I'm being led anymore. I can be very creative. But I don't design weddings in my head. If I see something that inspires me, my mind immediately goes "ooh, how can I make this into a cake". I'm just so confused. I have no idea what I'm doing, just like always.

I want to create. I see things that inspire me, and I want to create, something. I don't know what, most of the time, just something. I can't draw or sketch, or sculpt or paint, I just need to find my niche. Maybe it is cake. Maybe it's been staring me in the face for the last 2 1/2 years. Whatev. Sorry I'm thinking out loud. Hopefully, some of my ideas will come to life soon, and then maybe just maybe I'll make some headway.